Monday, January 29, 2007

A traditional British invention


We as British Citizens are apparently known for our patience, adaptability and tolerance

Our tolerance is frequently tested these days but by and large we adapt and overcome.
The British acceptance of queueing is a manifestation of this ( ingrained from war time austerity..blah blah..blah)

We accept queues and waiting lists in our stride.
Lets face it, if you deal with a body be it NHS, Tax office, Education Authority or indeed a Police front office.... 9am onwards... and there was no queue and the person behind the desk said immediately 'Can I help... yes I can deal with you now ' There are some including myself who might think that I wandered into an alternative universe.

This idea of queueing has apparently found itself into suggestions for waiting lists for jail places.
A Judge or Bench could look sternly at the accused and say 'you are going to serve a certain term which will start.........'when a place becomes available.'
Likely to bring a smile to those in the dock.. but what happens when his time is getting near to the front of that queue.

Would this lead to situation where knowing at some point they will end up inside, queues are likely to form at the more relaxed regimes if places are rumoured to become available.

I considered that the plot was reported LOST at the Home Office some time ago.

I now wonder whether it is now buried beneath a Patio somewhere in the Whitehall area.

Monday, January 22, 2007

And the winner is...

I see that this is the second upcoming occasion for' The Problem Solving Awards'.
They are basically a recognition of neighborhood teams and their efforts to tackle issues affecting that area
There are 8 on the Shortlist this year.
I dont know whether William Hill are offering odds on this years nominees but if they were I would have a flutter on Bromleys effort.
Its entitled 'Safe and Sound- Reducing Crime in the Bromley Night Time Economy'.
Established as a response to the extended drinking hours and the perceived increase in antisocial behaviour and violence.

I love the use of language.

Its got to have a head start with a Title like that.

I mean .... reducing crime in the area around Bromleys Pubs and Clubs...that would be sooo Pre- Millennium.
It grabs the attention and gives pause for thought. I also like the use of the word perceived. As though its just that the public might have misconsidered.... and in fact, the drunken idiots prior to the relaxed licensing laws are actually just the same before things changed.

I wish it well, as others, in pursuit of that prize.

I hope it sets a trend.

I look forward to hearing of clampdowns on Hemp plant family entrepreneurial units and portals being breached in raids on addictive Cocaine salt domiciles.

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Flannel Bore

I was wandering through the canteen today and noticed Sky News showing some form of demonstration overseas. At one point they were burning something.
For once it didnt seem to be an American or British Flag.

I asked what this was about.I was told it was about Big Brother. My attention captured I watched the item as I was informed that the 'household' had been embroiled in allegations of Racism.

From what I can gather the 'racism' is more just stupid, ill thought comments of some inmates towards another.

The viewing public views this little TV microcosm and it becomes its own little Society. Its inmates chose to be there so it loses any 'trueness' but the nonsense they come out with is the nonsense that people do come out with in the wide world.
So perceived slights become issues and issues become insults and insults become Crime reports.

That the Prime Minister can, apparently, be deflecting questions on this at PM Question time, by 'bandwagon jumpers' tells me as much about our Society as this programme does.

What next? Are we to see Noel Edmonds dragged before a Commons Select committee because 'Deal or No Deal' only has boxes of a certain colour and someone somewhere has drummed up a campaign asking for some Diversity?

Hell in a basket?........... Now arriving Platform 4.

Thursday, January 11, 2007

I am in there...somewhere.

It looks like the MET is in for another spell of Diversity monitoring.

Next month we are invited to inform those that care as to our sexual orientation and faith/belief.

This is to cover the two outstanding Strands of Diversity
There are six in total.

I wont bother to go through them as I am sure they are available on a web page or stairwell poster near you now.
I also wont mention them as they basically (despite all the E mails) will have no impact on the way I approach my job...
...unless of course I am going for a Board or promotion, in which case I will tell anyone who is prepared to listen that they fill my every, waking hour.

These mini surveys irritate me.They crop up on most forms you have to process via HR.
They are particularly annoying as they never seem to have a tag saying 'Mind your own business' on the drop down menu.

However I may look favourably on this invitation.

Firstly, it may give me a warm glow as I think that my little contribution is helping to keep an entire Department... somewhere... in work.
Secondly, I wonder how the relevant Diversity unit and Stats keepers can develop a Positive Action strategy or identify areas for further engagement to deal with ....say...
a Transgender 'curious' who worships the Sun god RA.

I know I will have hit all the right buttons somewhere if a pamphlet appears in a few months, covering these topics, tucked into the ever expanding rack in the front office.

Saturday, January 06, 2007

You're either in or your out

Prison Chief Phil Wheatley admits he doesn't really know who is currently 'at large' from the fluffier ends of our custodial system. A 'database' is being developed...though if any database system developed by the Home office is being finalised I recommend that the 'lags at large' relax for a few years before awaiting a knock at the door.

Considering myself 'Teco' material I recommend that resources be applied to the Derbyshire Constabulary. Apparently those wanted are at a fair chance of anonymity.
CC Mr Coleman worries about releasing images of those on the run.

Those over the 'apparently non- existing' wall can rest safe in their particular pit as Derbyshires public are reduced to looking for blanked out silhouettes or images with black bars across the mouth and eyes.

2007 does not start well.

Monday, January 01, 2007

Have you seen your 'Annus Horriblis' ?

To answer my own question above... I believe I did.

I have worked the majority of New Years Eves in my career, however the wildlife who landed in my little parcel of paradise surpassed themselves with their behaviour this year.
Things were quiet early on, but after the ramped up sense of false 'bonhomie' faded after midnight and the alcohol and drugs kicked in and the groups of surly aggressive youth moved away from the centre...things kicked off.

The Teams on duty were ran ragged for a long period with call after call and the numbers became thinner and thinner as arrests were made and units were tucked up with victims.

Scum don't have manning levels or cost considerations. They just meet up, form into groups.
Unfortunately Police do and we have to deal with whatever happens with the officers who are posted for that shift

I think the Teams on duty 'just' managed to keep a lid on it but it was close to some form of anarchy at one point as gangs just roamed and randomly attacked individuals.
I do not think there was any purpose to it. The gratuitous level of violence was the key.
The fact that they could, with little opportunity for the victim to fight back..
Any theft of property just seemed to be an afterthought.
On personally dealing with the aftermath of a number of incidents and reading the details of the rest on the 'box' later, even I as a (if I can use the word) 'veteran' felt numbed and angry as to what had gone on over the period.

There are those who might say 'Well its that time of year its just a one off'.. but I just can't accept that.

These scum do not transform from well behaved individuals into marauding, amoral, violent gangs because of the time of the year. Its because they are what they are and they have NO respect for those who have to be around them or any form of Authority.

As a country I would like to use the F word and say we are.....
However a I will quote Dads army ( a fictional character I know) but from a time when Britain was a far more stoic and basically decent place to be.... 'We're Doomed.. Doomed I tell ye'

Miserable post I know but it was one of those shifts.

Those that do dip into my Blog, thanks, take care for 2007 ( or any other year after that!) and look out for yourselves, family and colleagues.