Tuesday, February 12, 2013

Total whimsy

Rumours are being heard that the Vatican has made discrete approaches to Sir Bernard Hogan Howe asking if he wishes to be considered on the short list for the upcoming Papal vacancy.

Insiders believe he could bring a fresh take to the Catholic Church bringing in a vibrant concept of Total Christianity.

They believe he may have been making subtle overtones for the position with his introduction of the Ten Commitments and also regular meetings called Breakfast with the Commissioner. Although not exactly the Last Supper, it rarely attracts more than 12 people and the symbolism has hit a chord with the Church.

It’s admitted that the introduction of an outsider to an organisation that has been around for so long will be controversial. However they have been particularly taken with the gospel according to Winsor and see this as a first step to bringing the Church into the brave new world of the 21st century.

Other ideas being floated are the delving into other untapped talent. Those that might be considering a career in the police might try for a fast track promotion to Bishop and Archbishop.

A Vatican insider said ‘They would get to wear a ‘pointy hat’ when they are promoted and not have to wear it during their probation’

Noises from the Commissioner’s Office are apparently mixed. There is some indignation at the potential ‘tapping up’ by the Vatican.

Unofficial comments are that ‘the Commissioner has no intention of taking this offer seriously. He knows there are still a number of the unconverted in his current flock and wants to work to bring those back into the fold. The Word is out there and there can be nothing but the Word’

......and so it was thus.